Should Donald Trump and the American Government give the Suquamish Tribe their land back?

Date: 4th Apr 2017 @ 12:32pm

For your homework, I would like you to write the opening paragraph for a discussion text that is going to explore this question?

Challenge- can you write a full discussion text?

 

 

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Oliver P wrote:

Because of the incompetent issue of the land in Puget sound(which is in the USA east coast in Washington),there has been continuous debate as to whether or not Donald Trump should consider giving the land back .This evil controversy-which has been going on for 160 years- is of vital importance because Indians and Europeans say they should give the land back; consequently, their both arguing against Donald trump. However, Donald Trump still thinks the land should stay the way it is.

James Clarke wrote:

That's good Oliver

Miss Smith wrote:

Green- dashes for parenthesis of a relevant relative clause

Pink up level- Can you tell me why you think this issue is "incompetent"?

Haydn B wrote:

Since the arrival of Pacific Coast railway in north west america(Puget sound) ,there has been much discussion as to whether or not the indigenous people should receive their land back. This raging controversy is aggressive to the native Americans because they deserve their land back because they have tried hard to get their land back. If you want to here more information about this discussion text read on

Miss Smith wrote:

Green- Good use of complex sentence starting with a subordinating conjunction.

Pink- Can you find any missing capital letters?

Grace C wrote:

Even thought Donald Trump wants to keep a well known patch of land called Puget Sound ( with is located in the USA east coast Washington ), there has been on going arguments as to whether or not Mr Trump should give the land back; furthermore, this never-ending debate - that is said to have gone on for 160 years - is a vital importance for the Indians because they have only around 7,000 acres to live on. On the other hand, Donald Trump is still continuing to think that he should keep this land which holds a famous train station called Pacific Railway. To find out more about this debate read on.

Miss Smith wrote:

Green- parenthesis and conjunctive adverbials.

Pink- Now that you have developed such a wonderful editing technique, I wonder if you can read through your introduction and spot any pinks yourself?

Ocean M wrote:

Since the deal made by Issac Stevens that the of Puget sound should no longer be the home of the Suquamish Tribe but an area were the railway across the pacific runs through there has been an relenting debate as to whether or not the native Americans should get there home back.

Dr Penelope - a renowned Tribe activist - has campaigned that Donald Trump should a least give 5,000 acres to grow their crops.

Miss Smith wrote:

Green- dashes for parenthesis.

Pink- Take another look Ocean. How can you make this writing as effective as your class work?

Patrick C wrote:

Should Donald Trump give the Suquamish Tribe their land back?

Puget Sound (located along the Northwestern coast of America) is now owned by the Washington DC Government. Native Americans,who have lived in harmony with Puget Sound for many years,have suggested that they should have their land back. On the other hand,Donald Trump-president of U.S.A,known for his controversial opinion about refugees and Native Americans-has reacted strongly,claiming that the indiginous people have enough land as it is (7,657 acres) and also have fishing rights.

Do you think that the demands of the Suquamish Tribe are rightful because they are descendents of the first people who occupied this region or is Donald Trump right to keep this land as property of the government?

Miss Smith wrote:

Green- wonderful use of embedded relative clauses with an omitted relative pronoun.

Pink- I wonder if you could use the subjunctive form to include the hyperthetical ?

Patrick C wrote:

Should Donald Trump give the Suquamish Tribe their land back?

Puget Sound (located along the Northwestern coast of America) is now owned by the Washington DC Government. Native Americans,who have lived in harmony with Puget Sound for many years,have suggested that they should have their land back. On the other hand,Donald Trump-president of U.S.A,known for his controversial opinion about refugees and Native Americans-has reacted strongly,claiming that the indiginous people have enough land as it is (7,657 acres) and also have fishing rights.

Do you think that the demands of the Suquamish Tribe are rightful because they are descendents of the first people who occupied this region or is Donald Trump right to keep this land as property of the government?

Ciera W wrote:

Should Donald Trump and the American Government give the Suquamish Tribe their land back?

It is a well-known fact that the American Government built a Railway going through Puget Sound - where the Native Americans live - and the Native Americans had more than 87,000 acres of land, now they have less than 8,000 acres. Donald Trump and the American Government own Puget sound, because they bought it many years ago; however, the Native Americans were living in America before it was invaded by people from Europe: Spain, France, England, Italy, etc. Should Donald Trump and the American Government give the Suquamish tribe their land back?

Miss Smith wrote:

Green- Effective use of questioning. Conjunctive advervials

Pink- Can you find any missing capital letters?

James C wrote:

Should Donald Trump give the land back?

Have you ever heard of the Squamish tribe?
Since the arrival of Isaac Stevens in America, there has been much discussion as to whether or not the Squamish tribe should get their land back.

Give it back.
it is causing pollutions such as air pollution; soil pollution; water pollution; noise pollution and light pollution and cutting down the trees can cause less oxygen approximately 1-3 % of oxygen could be lost

keep it.
It should be kept because it has already been paid for and they can't get the money back and the Pacific Railway has already been built.

Conclusion.
So what do you think should the American Government give it back or not and I hope I taught you something about the Squamish tribe.

Miss Smith wrote:

Green- you have included the Commissioner of Indian Affairs at the time.

Pink- could you use conjunctive adverbials to develop the ideas in your text?

Joseph A wrote:

Should Donald Trump and the Governmet give the suqumish tribe their land back?

Over the years,Donald Trump and the Washington DC Government have bought the railway of the Suqumish tribe.However,a large majority of governments have made serious claims that they should be allowed their land back.This is a vital importance because Puget Sound (where they live) is their brother and sister.This life changing discussion has even tribologists around the world discussing this.Should the indigenous tribe have their land back...Donald Trumps said no but others say yes!

Miss Smith wrote:

When was the Pacific Line Railway built? Who built it? Could it have been Donald Trump that bought it?

Green- good use of present perfect tense

Pink- can you spot an article that isn't right and a missing question mark?

Zachary W wrote:

Should Donald Trump give the Suquamish tribe their land back?

Donald Trump has caused issues in Puget Sound - which is located near Washington. The native Americans were forced to give up 80,000 acres of land many years ago; however, the government have been arguing recently whether or not a railway track on this land should remain open for much longer. This controversy is of vital importance because the indigenous people (who grew up in Puget Sound) have claimed that it has effected their every day lives and that Donald Trump and the American government should give back the land. This argument (which has been going on for over 160 years) should be decided once and for all.

Miss Smith wrote:

Green- wonderful use of our word of the day.

Pink- I wonder if you can decide how the punctuation for parenthesis might be changed for clarity and purpose?

Olivia H wrote:

Should Donald Trump and the Washington DC Government give the Suquamish Tribe their land back?
Even though Isaac Stevens-who used to be the Commissioner of Indian Affairs-and the Washington DC Government claimed the Suquamish Tribe's land of Puget Sound for themselves many years ago, there still remains a perilous argument as to whether or not this indigenous tribe deserve to be given their land back. Puget Sound is located along the north western coast of the American state Washington. This controversial argument is of imperative significance because a large proportion of Native Americans have made serious claims that they have a right to have their land returned to them; as a result, they believe Donald Trump- the current President of the USA -should return Puget Sound to the Suquamish Tribe. On the other hand, President Trump and the American Government have declared that the land is in use. If I were you, I would read on.

Miss Smith wrote:

Green- subjunctive form. Improved formal tone.

Pink- Can you think of an opening to a discussion text that isn't a subordinating conjunction.

Eva-Mae J wrote:

Although the Washington Government and Donald Trump have owned puget sound (which is along the north west coast of Washington) for many years,their still remains lots of discussion as to whether or not the suquamish tribe should be allowed their land back. As this perilous debate is still incomplete,it is of a vital importance because a significant amount of people have argued that the aboriginal tribe should fight for their rights. If I were you, I would read on.

Darcy R wrote:

Should the Native Americans be allowed to have their land back?

Since the American government have bought Puget sound, (which is located on the East coast of the U.S.A in Washington) there has been much discussion and unsure faces as to whether or not the Washington DC government will be allowed their land back.However, if the American government doesn't give the Native Americans their land back then they will have to give up more than 70,000 acres of land just for a railway to be built.This never-ending controversy has been continuing reapetdly -without stop- for 150 years straight. A significant amount of Native Americans and citizens in the USA have questioned the Wasington DC government and Chief Seattle when they are going to make their decision. If I were to I would read on.

Miss Smith wrote:

Green- use of the hyphen and dash.

Pink- if is a subordinating conjunction. Can you see how that might make a difference to where you place a comma?

Maisie P wrote:

Should Donald Trump and the government give the Native Americans their land back?

Since the American Government have colonised land from from the Native Americans in puget sound ( which is located along the North West coast of Washington ) , there has been much discussion as to whether or not Donald Trump should give their land back to the squeamish tribe . This life - changing experience of having a train built over the land ( by Isaac stevens ) has affected the lives of Native Americans because of ai pollution , soil pollution , thermal pollution and many more factors it could cause. If you want to see both sides of the argument read on .

Miss Smith wrote:

Green- colonised one of our words of the day. Much improved use of parenthesis.

Pink- can you explain (using the correct grammar terms) why the last sentence should have a comma in it?

Erin S wrote:

Should Donald Trump and the U.S Government give the Suquamish Tribe their Land back?

The Treaty of Point Elliot of 1855 is the lands settlement treaty between the United States government and the nominal Native American tribes of the Puget Sound region.

There has been a long history of arguments over this land and many other Indian reservations, this is one of more than 60 reservations selected to join a $1.9 billion federal initiative to return land to the control of the tribal governments.

The reservation forms part of a U.S. "Land Buyback Program" with the goal of returning it to tribal ownership for uses that benefit the reservation.

I personally believe that if Donald Trump has anything to do with this it will come down to money.

Miss Smith wrote:

Green- use of proper nouns work to give the text much more credibility.

Pink- can you create a paragraph that uses your own writing to join the points together with cohesion.

George G wrote:

It is a well known fact that the Pacific Railway runs through the land that the Native Americans resided in for years. Since the Government bought Puget Sound ( which is located along the North West Coast of Washington) there remains lots of striking debates as to whether or not their land should be returned to the Suquamish Tribe. This life-changing controversy is of optimum importance because a significant amount of people have declared that the Native Americans should fight for their rights. If I were you, i'd read on....

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